Tuesday, 24 April 2012

women.....utterly complicated beings

Its easy to give advice when you aren't involved in the situation.  That's why they always advocate that you get someone neutral and not involved to talk to when you are in trouble, or just need some sensible advice.  However good the advice is does one actually take that advice?  Or like me do you listen but never actually take the advice because you know deep down that perhaps it makes sense but I need to go rant and rave and do all the wrong things because I am hurting.
All the advice columns and the relationship gurus say that when you break up, women want answers and we shouldn't write to the man wanting an explanation, or even write to him to give him a piece of your mind.  It doesn't make men think they say, it only makes them thankful that the relation ship is over.  But we want to give them a piece of our mind, we want to ask why, we want to know what happened, we want to analyse and try to figure it out. we want to probe into the depths of his mind to know what he is thinking about everything. 

Why do we do it.  Is it too simple for us to know that he just isn't that into you, that's why the relationship failed?  Is it too simple for us to fathom that he just isn't bothered with the whole relationship part and just wants it to remain as it was.  Is it too simple for us to let it remain as it was.  Why the hell cant we just be as simple as it should be!  Why the hell were we created so complicated that we run the risk of alienating the very person we want to bring closer. 
We cant just let it be, and for me, I think its because we fall in love and we want to be with this one person forever.  Alot of us want the marriage and the wedding to prove to the world that this one man is mine all mine.  I don't want the marriage, been there done that and a piece of paper or a whole ceremony doesn't tell me or the world that the man is mine.  I do however want a man to want to make some sort of commitment to me, to share my life with me.  That's the hard part I guess, compromising and trusting and trying to get both sides to do that.  Do I walk away from something and someone I adore and start afresh or do I stay and nurture it and accept that I will be the one doing most of the compromising.......

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