Saturday 29 March 2014

Death by chocolate

It's dangerous when I am bored......I get up to mischief.

So it's a good thing I channel that mischief into my cooking..........
The twin was over here for a visit and she brought me good quality cooking chocolate as she knows I love cooking.  Today I thought I would make dessert, something with chocolate which I could enjoy with  a glass of red wine with said chocolate dessert........

after a lovely dinner of roast chicken and roast pumpkin, I had gluten free chocolate lava cake.......

I got the recipe for the chocolate lava cake Here and you know how
those chefs are always telling you to get good ingredients ......well fuck me, they were right.
It's makes a big bloody difference!

God damn it was good, as good as a great orgasm while having sex with a real live man, as opposed to having sex with BOB my battery operated friend.......but I digress.

Death by chocolate....the only way to go...




Wednesday 26 March 2014

the long and short of it

As a Sikh  girl growing up I was not allowed to cut my hair.  While the parents were not uber religious they still conformed to the norm of the Sikh religion that we do not cut our hair.
me at 1

that's me on the left nxt to sis on her bday
with a big fat plait.  notice the 60's buns on the ladies
My father however, cut his hair when he went to India to do his flying, which of course pissed his parents off.  Mum kept her hair long in the early days of marriage and insisted on her children following suit........until my younger sister had her hair cut when she was a toddler as combing her hair was torture for both Mum and her.  Then when baby brother was born, the parents fucking cut his hair too!

me on the right in red, 70's
 when I had my asthma attacks,
check out the braids/plaits
So there we were the two oldest of the siblings with long plaits, while our two younger siblings had short manageable hair.  My hair grew long and thick and I could at one time actually sit on my hair.  I had to plait it every morning before school and when I turned 13, my hair was so heavy and thick that I begged Mum to let me cut it.  She finally relented and my older sister and I could cut our hair, but the length had to be down to the middle of our backs......

When I eloped with the ex, (I was 17) he got me to cut my hair short,
80's haircut! with my babies
as that would make it harder for the parents to find me I guess.....and I kept it short until I divorced him.  From then till now I had it at various lengths, keeping it boy short for 10 years as well.  My sons hated that haircut, for years they told me I looked like a lesbian butch out for revenge on men.....perhaps that was the look I was going for....... and I was hit on by many women while I was in my short hair phase.  I grew my hair out after 2007, when I started seriously looking for a man..........another Epiphany!

haircut  2007
Since then my hair has been at varying lengths but never have I gone back to the short boy cut.  This last two years I have had it long, and frankly  I am quite useless at doing anything fancy with my hair or putting it up elegantly, I just look messy and unkempt.  Lustrous hair is wasted on me.  I don't like spending time on my hair, or going to the hairdressers to have anything done, and I last cut my hair at the end of June last year!

I finally chopped it off on Saturday, not boy short but short and
from 2012 
bouncy enough to put a spring in my step and have everyone tell me I look fresh and younger....not that I want to look younger but it doesn't hurt the ego to have young men look at me and smile and tell me that I look nice with the new haircut, and after A bashed/minced/trampled/chewed and spat out my heart, it feels good.....

I tried to put up  pics from all decades, what is missing is the 90's but the hair was short like the 80's.  Whats also missing is the pic of me and the new haircut.



Monday 17 March 2014

eating crow for the week

I always thought that once an old rocker hits a certain age they should just retire.  Like Ozzy Osborne, Paul McCartney (not a rocker but you get the drift).  Once they hit a certain age, the voice falters, the energy wanes and they look quite pathetic on stage.  Its heart wrenching to watch them when they cant sing anymore.

Last year I watched one of my heroes on stage - Robert Plant and I was quite relieved that he could still sing live, he may not have the full strong voice anymore but it was still there, and so was his charisma on stage.

The Rolling Stones are on their Asia leg of their world tour and tickets got snapped up in 2 hours!  The tickets were also overpriced but that is what one pays to watch rock royalty.  I wasn't too disappointed as I thought the concert would be a dud anyway, they are too old and even though I worshiped them, I didn't think they would be as good.....blah blah blah....... sour grapes........

they came out to say hi
Well the venue where the Stones were performing decided to hold a mini rock festival, inviting local bands to play in an open event plaza and open it up to the public for free.  Yes that's right, free!  and they were having a large screen and would beam the Stones concert out to the locals who couldn't afford the tickets, all for free as well.
I wanted to watch a couple of the old local rock bands that were performing but wasn't that keen to stay to watch the Stones........ well I ended up staying, and am now eating crow as Mick blew my mind!
Forget the fact that the faces are creased ( I applaud them though as no botox or surgery!!) and Keith seems to have a pot belly, their energy especially Mick's would put some younger rockers to shame.  That man oozes charisma out of every pore in his body, that pout, the moves ( like only Jagger can do) haven't slowed or changed since he started this rock thing.  The man is 70 for fucks sake!

So this week I shall humbly eat crow and admit I was oh so wrong about the Stones!

Tuesday 4 March 2014

self censorship

When I started this blog I naively thought that I could write anything I wanted to.
I would write it as it is........write everything that was happening to me......be open about everything.
Well that hasn't happened.

I find that I don't want to share everything.  This last couple of months there have been changes happening in my life but I choose not to share as it's very painful and personal.  While writing is cathartic and I have several drafts  to prove it, I wont publish those posts.
Is it self censorship or is it that  in this day and age of over sharing I want some things left private (that's why I have a love hate relationship with Facebook!)
  I keep to myself the most private things that are going on in my life as publishing those thoughts will involve hurting people I love and care deeply about..

I am not coping well with the stress of whats been happening and for me that's a first.  My big sis thinks my hormones have gone out of whack and I think I am living in some LSD fueled private hell.  Alcohol is no longer the relaxing beverage it used to be.  It now makes we weep for no apparent reason ( after at least 5 gins.  I am still ok after 3 but beyond that ....beware the weeping monster).

If this is menopause well then,  I don't want it, take it back!  But I doubt it is Menopause.  I think its decisions that I have to make and coming to terms with family that have broken my heart.  I have always been good at sweeping feelings under the rug and just getting on with things..... I guess its time to face the issues and not hide away.

Until then I will be biting my tongue.....