When I started this blog I naively thought that I could write anything I wanted to.
I would write it as it is........write everything that was happening to me......be open about everything.
Well that hasn't happened.
Is it self censorship or is it that in this day and age of over sharing I want some things left private (that's why I have a love hate relationship with Facebook!)
I keep to myself the most private things that are going on in my life as publishing those thoughts will involve hurting people I love and care deeply about..
I am not coping well with the stress of whats been happening and for me that's a first. My big sis thinks my hormones have gone out of whack and I think I am living in some LSD fueled private hell. Alcohol is no longer the relaxing beverage it used to be. It now makes we weep for no apparent reason ( after at least 5 gins. I am still ok after 3 but beyond that ....beware the weeping monster).
If this is menopause well then, I don't want it, take it back! But I doubt it is Menopause. I think its decisions that I have to make and coming to terms with family that have broken my heart. I have always been good at sweeping feelings under the rug and just getting on with things..... I guess its time to face the issues and not hide away.
Until then I will be biting my tongue.....