the labyrinth of medical appointments and lab results

As one ages, one has to commence the endless joys of medical appointments to suss out the issues relating to cholesterol, diabetes, stomach issues... the list is endless

Warning to all you youngsters out there
eat right from the beginning and don't think it gets better as you age.. it's downhill  after 45

Anyway

I have always thought that I was intolerant to gluten so I finally went to get tested as my stomach issues were just getting worse.
I had my blood test done on the 17th of December and to date I had not heard back from the hospital where I did my tests. I do have access to the tests as we have an app where all your medical records are and I can see them I just don't understand them.

So I called the clinic where I had my tests done today to find out what was going on..

Me:  Good Morning is this Clinic A (it really is called Clinic A)

Clinic A:  Yes Good Morning, How can I help

Me:  I went in to see Dr .... on the 17th of Dec and I was supposed to get a call back from your clinic on my date for a scope, can I check if a scope has been scheduled?

further along in the conversation

Clinic A:  We only did the blood test, you have to call The Endopace clinic to get your scope date, and someone is supposed to call you from there to council you on your blood test results.

Council me on my blood test results.... that was scary!

so I called the Endoscopy clinic
repeating what i said to clinic A -  I went in to see Dr .... on the 17th of Dec and I was supposed to get a call back from your clinic on my date for a scope, can I check if a scope has been scheduled?

She confirms my name etc and then says

Endoscopy C:  Oh yah, its scheduled for April 6th

Me:  So why hasn't someone called me or sent me a text to inform me of this

Endoscopy C: we would be sending a text 1 week before the scope

Me:  really?  I was told I was going to be informed 2 weeks after my visit to the doctor, do you not think we need to plan our lives a little?

Endoscopy C: oh er sorry anyway ( and she launches into what I must do before the scope)

Me:  what about my blood test results

Endoscopy C: Oh that you have to call Clinic A...

So I call Clinic A again

Me, quite irritated now: Can I know if I will have someone talk to me about my blood test results?

Clinic A:  Sorry ma'am, that the Dr will discuss with you after your scope

(no mention of the counselling call i was supposed to receive and I was too irritated to ask)

Me, wanting to hit someone by now:  So you expect me to wait till April to find out what is wrong with me?

Clinic A: err I can expedite your request

Me wondering who   I can strangle by now:  Really, yes please expedite this like I need a call back by today or tomorrow!

Clinic A : yes ma'am like I said I will expedite this


What THE FUCK!
No I didn't say that to him... I had already hung up by then

so I still don't know whats wrong with me, I still don't know if I am indeed celiac or whether there is something worse happening to me..

I will wait till end of tomorrow and if I haven't heard from the hospital I will be calling them back.....