Friday, 4 January 2013

an ego boost.....or is it just a personality disorder

So I got on the dating website again and I think I went on it to give my ego a boost.  Walking away from A is probably one of the hardest things I have done and feeling so down, I decided to do some mindless  prowling by joining this free site
Its a good way to get men to notice, comment and give compliments.  Its a much needed ego boost.  Or do I have a serious defect in my DNA that says I have no idea how and where to go to attract a man that I have to go online and prowl.
I  doubt very much I will meet the man of my dreams on this site, I think I have given up on that. Also the man of my dreams didn't want a relationship!! (Oh shut up and get off the merry go round of woe is me! That 'voice' by the way,  is Simone telling me off)
Simone is me, my alter ego and no I do not have split personality disorder (hopefully).
You know how in Eat Love Pray or was it Eat Pray Love, doesn't matter,  but in the book/movie she hears voices that tell her things will be OK.  Well I have that in my head too and I suspect most of us do, I just named that voice Simone. I like that name.  I wish my parents had named me Simone and not some impossible to pronounce Indian name.
Where was I .....
Oh yes. going on the Internet to get an ego boost.
I am not ready to go out and date, but the boost my ego gets when men contact me makes up for the emptiness I feel inside.  it is like being out in a club with men hitting on you, only thing is you are safe at home in front of a computer, in your pyjamas and eating a bar of hazelnut chocolate.
Feel good factor lasts a few minutes.  Its a cheap but necessary ego boosting thrill.


  1. I totally have an alter ego that gives a running commentary in my head. That's normal, right?
    Let's go with yes, otherwise we're both crazy:)

    1. Yes Yes, totally normal (see you in the mental wards someday!)